Hi friend. Whatcha up to?

For real, I don’t think I’ve visited this website since 2017. I’ve been on social media, but I have a distinct fear of my own website. I mean, wow, 2012 is calling.

This post isn’t any announcement or big change. Over the last long while many lovely humans have said they miss my podcast, miss me, miss my work. So while I’m evaluating the abandoned ruins of a former self, thought I’d say hellooo and catch up.

A little about me right now, in case we’ve crossed paths.

DIFFERENT: Less anxiety. Less depression. Less nice and more kind.

A few big life shifts: I’m back in college taking science prerequisites to apply to grad school. Basically pre-med. My father died last year, which has introduced to me a unique grief I had only heard about. I’ve been sorta open about my mental health treatment the last few years. It’s some trippy shit. Someday maybe I’ll regale. 

Oh, also I’m a bit burnt out on sex parties. That’s weird for me. 

SAME: I am still a Sex Nerd. Still identify as polyamorous. Still agender inside and femme-ish outside. Still in Los Angeles and I still love snacks. 

RESURFACING: Lately, my craving has come back for sticking microphones in people’s faces and demanding they tell me everything they know about butt stuff. 

BTW: ON BEING A SEX NERD – I’ve debated what it means to be a sex nerd since I coined the term for myself in 2009. I never share any of that stuff. It’s always moving. Right now, this is what I have: The situation of being a sex nerd is that the knowledge I acquire about sex and love always outpaces what my experience can provide. 

That statement is begging for several addendums, but for now, that’s fine.

Hey, thanks for stopping by. 



Posted in sex

10 thoughts on “Hi friend. Whatcha up to?

  1. Always do what you need first.
    I feel you on the roller coaster of mental health, grief and trying to rebuild yourself.

    Always be you, and your fans will love you regardless (and if they hate you, that’s a them problem).

  2. Hey, thanks for being you. I’m one of the people that miss your podcast. There is something amazing about your voice and manner that makes you so worth listening to. If you ever get back to podcasting, know that we will be waiting for you!

  3. Congratulations on doing all that things for yourself.

    The evolution of Sex Nerd Sandra is a journey we love to read about.

    Following you in Facebook let’s me cheer for you from my corner of the world but it is always joyful to see an email or hear your voice too.

    Have a wonderful day!

  4. You are you, and that is always enough. I enjoy the thought of you combining your sex positivity with some kind of health care and enducation. If that’s what your future holds, I hope you will share with us so we can help and cheer. But whatever you do, know that you are a source of light and a force for good in this world.

  5. Like a good friend an out of the blue check in is always welcome. I do miss hearing your voice and learning from you but I do revisit many lessons you taught. Definitely take care of you, as an teacher, a public person, a leader, we need to show others that we are valuable and we need to take time for ourselves. It isn’t selfish or lazy, it is necessary. Looking forward to hearing from you again. Take care till then.

  6. Miss your podcast greatly. Wish I had found it earlier, since I found it about 3 months before you stopped. Be well.

  7. So weird, I just started listening to your podcast and feel so connected with you as I feel your just like me and that feels awesome. I always thought I was different and judged by women because I’m not like them. I refer to myself as the Peggy Bundy always begging for sex in my marriage where my friends are turning it down. I also started masturbation at a very young age. Anyways back to my main point I just started listening to you wanted to say something to you and find out you just lost your dad and I’m so sorry about that. I also just lost my dad only 2 years after losing my mom. Both too young and it has changed a lot of how I view things and happiness. Also the fact that I have had to admit I need help. Thanks for everything and know that you have helped me by just letting me know I’m not freakish and there are others like me.

  8. Glad to hear from you! Best of luck with all of the new discoveries within you, I’m currently in the processing of doing that so I know it isn’t easy. It has been a few years since I have listened to your podcasts, a lot has changed since then but I’m grateful to you and your work, it has shaped my sex life before it began. I’d love to keep having an open conversation about all things sex-related in a safe and non-judging environment, that’s what you provided for me. Thanks for that, I really appreciate it. Best of luck in your current endeavors and have a great rest of your week!



  9. Dear Sandra,

    Though it has been a while since you last posted your podcast, I recently discovered it by accident. I am 27 and, like you,also suffering from anxiety and depression. In addition to that I have a lack of confidence and, for a long time, had difficulty approaching women not to mention having confidence in sex (due to my lack of experience). However after listening to your podcast, I have developed a new energy of confidence I never new I had and feel I can be more assertive to both dating and sex. All thanks to you, your knowledge, and your podcast. Upon learning that your father past away, I have no words to express how much you are struggling with that and all I can wish you is the best, support you and be here as a voice if you would like someone to talk to. I also hope you succeed in college, your goal of grad school, and the goal that you strive for.

    Thank you again for sharing what you love and sharing it with the rest of your love.

    Wish you all the best,

    Ryan Whitney

Nerd out here & at the Sex Nerd Sandra facebook page!

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